|"A Song and a Moment"
by Karen Wood
Disclaimer: The usual. I don't own them. Others do. I'm just writing
my thoughts about the characters down and sharing. Without profiting
Summary: Michael thinks back on what he was feeling while he and Isabel sat at the diner counter in The End of the World.
Category: Unconventional Couples
|Sure I remember that day, I remember every part of it in fact. Why
shouldn't I? In fact, I make a point to hold that moment with me.
Locked away deep inside. Far enough inside that nothing can touch it.
Nothing can hurt it. And only I can feel it. But I don't let myself
do that very often. Feel it. I have no clue why....okay I do. Sure I
do. If I feel it too often or let someone know I'm feeling it it
could be ruined. Or worse yet be gone forever. And then what would I
have? How would I feel? How COULD I feel? I'm so damn afraid of that
place being empty. I have enough wounds and spaces and voids inside
of me. I don't need to have that ripped away as well. I can't have
that taken away. That's why I keep it where I do. I don't think even
Max and his mind-reading-warping crap could reach it. Not if I didn't
want him to. Which I don't.
What was that song that was playing? God, I can't remember the name of it! Why can't I remember? At that time, at that moment I thought I'd never forget it. It was playing on the jukebox and I was tapping my hand on my knee to the rhythm while bouncing my leg on the rung of the stool. Something she normally hated but didn't say anything about that day. Lucky me. Actually, I think I started doing that just because it irritated her. Now it was a habit I didn't even control. But not one word or one disapproving look at that moment. Because she was feeling it too. And was as lost in the feeling as I was.
I think it was a favorite song of hers. Or the singer was her favorite singer or something like that. I'm not quite sure. I just have this vague memory of her saying something about it and something about favorite. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe she was talking about a movie or a tv show or something. But to me it's all linked somehow. That song and that moment. She seemed to be enjoying it...the music...or maybe it was just me she was enjoying. Me and my company. I'd like to think that. God, what am I talking about? I know it. There I said it are you happy? For that moment in time she was enjoying me. Enjoying being with me. Just sitting and talking. God that's so simple isn't it? It was just like we'd done a million and one times before and yet it was like the first time. Know what I mean?
You know that saying? *There's a first time for everything?* With Isabel it's like that...even if it's not the first time. I know, I know. I can't explain it without sounding like a total dumbass. Some big goofy sappy dumbass. But it's true. Sometimes, when it's just the two of us...which doesn't happen too often, especially now...there's this moment. The air between us gets real clear. And colors and sounds around us do this muted thing, while the sound of our voices gets real pure. And I feel totally alive. And I know she feels the same. I can tell by the way she laughs and says my name. *Michael* No one says it quite like Iz. It's sorta breathy and calm and you know, strong. *Michael* She has no clue what that does to me when she says my name like that. Or maybe she does. She is Isabel afterall.
That song! I can almost hear it now. It's like I can hear the tune but not the words. The words are just out of reach...kinda lurking where I can't get a hold of them. It was that one singer. The one who Alex said was selling out. Whatever. Who the hell cares? If it's a good song it's a good song. It's like Iz and I. And that moment. It was good. So good. We were sitting at the diner counter laughing. And people were staring since it's not every day you see Queen Isabel and that Guerin kid laughing. And alone together. But who cares? Who the hell cares? We sure didn't. We had that moment and that song and we were together. And we were happy. And time stood still for us. And for our love...whether or not we were ready or able to admit it to each other or to ourselves.
God what was that song?
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